We now live in a society that has reduced marriage to nothing more than a man and a woman deciding to live under the same roof for as long as they can put up with each other, or until someone else more attractive comes along. In other words, we enter into relationships to satisfy our own needs and wants. Recently, we have seen quite a few of our high profile, public, entertainment figures displaying some of the most warped and destructive examples of married and family life. I still remember one entertainment figure (whom I will not name because it doesn’t matter) appeared on one of the more popular afternoon talk shows and said that his divorce was not an indication that his marriage was a failure. He went on to explain that it was a very successful marriage (all two years or so of it), that had run its course. We all know about the highly publicized 72 day marriage between the basketball star and the reality show queen. And speaking of reality shows, how about the Bachelor and Bachelorette reality shows. Indeed, they are such a mockery to the blessed institution of marriage. What kind of upside down mess of an idea are we setting up as an example for society to follow when we celebrate a man or woman going around testing out intimate moments with different people of the opposite sex (and thank God it’s the opposite sex) before making a wishy washy commitment to that person and calling it a marriage? Unfortunately, society is now mirroring these behaviors, and I am afraid the Church is now mirroring society. Our worship times are seeing more and more single moms and divorced women having to step into the role of spiritual head with their families and in the church. And this condition is only getting worse. Some statistics show that the divorce rate could go above fifty percent if the current trend continues.
Men, my challenge is to you: we are given an awesome responsibility in God’s Kingdom as husbands and fathers to our family and leaders to our community. Too many of us want all the above titles without the commitment. I believe the shortcoming of our commitment is now a direct link to the issues and ills we now face in our communities today: conditions that affect us directly, but more sadly our children and our children’s children. The Bible warns us of this and the resulting effects in Malachi 2:13-16
“Another thing you do: You flood the Lord’s altar with tears. You weep and wail because He no longer looks with favor on your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. You ask, “Why?” It is because the Lord is the witness between you and the wife of your youth. You have been unfaithful to her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant. Has not the one God made you? You belong to Him in body and spirit. And what does the one God seek? Godly offspring. So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful to the wife of your youth. “The man who hates and divorces his wife,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “does violence to the one he should protect,” says the Lord Almighty. So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful.”
The first thing the passage did was to answer our question of “Why”. Why are we struggling so much? Where are our heavenly favors? Didn’t we give our share of tithes and offering? Well, the Lord’s answer is, “He has seen your unfaithfulness”. But then in the same passage, the Lord asked us, “Has not the one God made you?” In other words, if we agree that the one God made us, why then do we swear by and live our lives as the world does, adopting to its many destructive principles and ideas? This is a very important question that we better get right and fix if we want to be in alignment with God’s word. There are three critical reasons for this: 1) About you: Verse 15 says “you belong to Him in body and spirit”. You belong to God, every part of you. This verse is expressing that your entire existence should reflect the Kingdom of God. 2) The children: the next part of the verse speaks for itself on how critical our roles as fathers are. It asks the question, “What does the one God seek?” Then the question is answered, “Godly offsprings”. What an awesome responsibility that is, raising up godly children. This is what God seeks and expects from us. Too often, the concept of fathers playing an important role in the lives of their children is waning in communities. As a matter of fact, it is totally accepted as the norm for the man to be completely absent from the child’s life. The law only requires for him to provide financial assistance in some cases. That’s like a farmer sowing his seed and not sticking around to attend to and nurture the crop. Eventually, the weeds will grow up around the plants and overcome them. Your harvest will not be fruitful and in some case the crop will fail! 3) The wife: Men, this is where your role as a protector comes in. Verse 16: “The man who hates and divorces his wife,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “does violence to the one he should protect,” says the Lord Almighty. So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful. There are just too many instances in which this concept is totally upside down. The wife has to seek protection from her husband. How wonderful is it for a wife to rest in the confidence of her husband’s protection physically, and most importantly, as her spiritual head and spiritual protector.
So be on your guard! Avoid being unfaithful! Be real! Do so by standing steadfast on the word of God, and your offerings will be pleasing unto to God. Let us re-examine ourselves as fathers and husbands to our families and as leaders in our community, both personally and collectively.
The Lord instructed His people to be this way in Deuteronomy 6:5-6:
Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.
Amen!!
J R Tracey
The Branch Life 
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